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Cyclesista

Sock it too Me 2009!

« Alrighty then! ***Updated! | Main | Bed rest, day 1 »

October 26, 2010

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Cat

Just don't pressure yourself with the bfing either. Do you really think I'm not close w/my kids bc I fed them formula from a bottle? (I know you weren't judging me. I'm just trying to say: think about it. Dies that really make sense?) If it works and you like it, awesome But you may find, as I did, that bfing or pumping and cleaning and sterilizing and feeding two newborns makes you unhappy and interferes with your enjoyment of the babies. I just hate to see you stake too much on the experience.

Sue

You have an awesome attitude! You're going to be a great twin mom!! My birth experience and subsequent bf'ing plans didn't go anything like I planned. I delivered my twins early via c-section, they spent 2 months in the NICU, and although they did both get to try breastfeeding a bit in the hospital.. it just never clicked for us in the long run. I pumped 8x a day for 4 months and decided one morning at 3am (after a near mental breakdown) that I had had enough with the damn pumping. Like "Cat" said, when bf'ing or pumping starts interfering with your ability to enjoy your babies, it's time to stop.

All that said, my best twin mom friend had her babies at full-term, no c-section, and she tandem nursed them at every feed until she went back to work. AND she didn't go crazy!! So it can and does work out for some people.

P.S. I took a multiples childbirth class and I can't say it was any different then a singleton class would have been, besides the 2 babies part.

Sara

I'm sorry that your childbirth class hasn't been all that great. I'm one of those people that met other moms and became dear friends in childbirth class, and I think that it stinks that your class wasn't better set up to facilitate friendships. Oh well. At least you learned about the pooping/childbirth connection (totally true, by the way).

I hope that breastfeeding works out for you, but I think you're totally right about it not being the be all end all. You'll be close to your kids regardless.

jaded

You got it sista: the point is to leave with 2 healthy babies and you are on your way. So sorry for your health scare but you are a trooper that takes a lickin and keeps on...

Erin

I definitely agree with the previous posters, I think you have an awesome attitude and are really focused on what is important here - bringing home two healthy babies. And you're right, it is incredibly easy to get wrapped up in the vision of the "perfect" birth experience -- and that rarely (if ever!) happens for women carrying only one baby, let alone pregnant with two. Giving birth is an incredible, awesome experience (whether by c-section or vaginal deliver, I'm sure!), and it would be unfortunate to be so wound up about things not being PERFECT that you aren't really present in those incredible moments.

As for b'fing, I think that is another hurdle to cross when you get to it. After preemie birth and NICU stays, one of my guys had a bad latch, and after a week of sheer frustration, I gave up on actually putting the boys to breast and decided to pump and bottle feed -- and I did it for the year. It is definitely manageable, and as I think I've mentioned to you before, you HAVE to purchase a hands-free pump bra!

a

All you have to do is roll with things, and you'll be fine. Any preconceived notions that don't come about adds to stress. So get an idea of what you want to do (sounds like you've got that already), and try your best, and if it doesn't work out...well, in the end, the only thing that matters is healthy babies.

I found the childbirth class essentially useless. The breastfeeding class was good, but they don't tell you that many people have problems. Here's the advice - keep trying and get the lactation consultants in ASAP to watch and help and advise. And if they make you feel stressed out or uncomfortable, ask for another one. Good luck.

Good Egg Hatched

Yeah, the whole roll-with-it approach is going to be very handy for you! I actually think that my craptastic birth experience was good for me...it taught me from the first moments of Henry's arrival that I needed to let go and try to see the good in reality rather than lament the things that didn't play out according to my fantasies. I was really upset about it for a few days in the hospital, but once I was home and fully in charge of a newborn it was no longer my focus. And now I know that we're just so lucky that he's healthy and happy...those first few moments of his life don't matter at all compared with the wonderful hours, days and weeks that have followed, and all the bonding we've done since then.

Same with breastfeeding...b/c of my PCOS I was prepared to have no milk at all, and I think those really low expectations helped me a lot. We made it to five months with supplemented breastfeeding and although pro-nursing people might think that was sub-par, I am enormously proud of it.

So basically what I'm saying is, keep going with the openness, with the focus on rolling with what comes. Because when those babies are here, they will be in charge!

Reese

Hi,
I recently stumbled upon your blog and wanted to tell you how uplifting and encouraging I find your story. I am so happy for you and your family. I am currently going through my 3rd IVF with my own eggs. My RE is not very optomistic about my chances. Needless to say, I've started searching for stories on the emotional process that comes with the DE decision. I absolutely loved your "road less traveled" post. Just wanted to drop a line and let you know you have given me great insight into this process when I needed it most. I will be hoping for the best for you and your boys!

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