I woke up at 4 to pee, and decided to take my thyroid meds so I could have yogurt or milk by 8 am, and then I got back in bed and starting thinking. Not my usual anxious flipping out DBT's but, well....excited. Like going to Disneyland excited, going to the lake excited; excited!
Of course, ye old dread is there too, nipping at my excitement like some dark shadowy figure saying "well, maybe you lost one, or both, or their heartbeats will be slow." But then, I hit the accelerator, and leave dread in the dust for a while. It seems to me the dread is much more pro-forma than before, and that is a nice respite from the last 4 years (4 YEARS! SHIT!) of nearly constant negativity and loss.
I hope we get good news today, and a large part of me imagines we will, but I won't truly relax until I see those little hearts beating away, and get good measurements on their little crowns to rumps!
In other news, Husband and I are planning a beach vacation, location to be determined. We'd love to go to Barbados (they have a NICU!) or Curacao, but we have to go in late August or early September, and that is not so great hurricane avoidance wise. But Hawaii is not so great budget wise. It's doable, but to stay in a place where we are by the actual water, and not in a condo or in a high rise hotel, is WAY out of our price range.
I bought a bikini top yesterday. I know. Crazy. But here is what I am thinking: My enormous bosom (34 G for those of you keeping score at home) doesn't seem to fit in conventional maternity tankini's or even conventional tankini's. Most of the suits are made for much larger back and much smaller cups. XL's swim on me and don't contain the girls. So I went to a bra shop dedicated to pretty bras for busty girls and got a great bikini top, and then ordered a coordinating string bikini bottom from VC. The one that went with the suit was WAY TOO tiny, so I went with my old standby. At the moment, I can't say as though I really feel as if the bod is bikini ready, but I also really hate swimming in a 1 piece, especially in the ocean; it feels like taking a bath with you clothes on! The shop owner, herself 7 months pregnant assured me that I'd be happiest in a bikini. I need to start Pilates as soon as the doc lets me, for back strength and left arm issues (can't really lay on that side.), so that will help to smooth out anything that can be smoothed, and then I'll wear a cover up the rest of the time.
Alrighty! Off to feed the wee beasties, and straighten up for the housekeeper. I'll update from my phone. Keep those thoughts and prayers a 'comin!
Tons and tons and tons of great thoughts! I just know you're going to get great news today, I feel it in my gut. I can't wait for your post later!
As for you vacation plans, anything will be awesome I'm sure. But I did want to my two cents for how awesome Hawaii is, especially the Big Island. Like, change your life amazin, even if you couldn't stay right on the beach. Though take a peek at condo rentals at vrbo.com in the Kona area of the Big Island - you might get a better deal on beachfront or at least oceanview than you think. And Hawaii is so pricey for eating out, that a condo would be great because you could save alot by making some meals at home.
Will be thinking of you all day!
Posted by: Lara | July 16, 2010 at 06:28 AM
It's 4 hours now. Can't wait for your update!
Beach vacation and bikini. FUN!
Posted by: It is what it is | July 16, 2010 at 07:03 AM
Yay for excited thoughts....keep the others away. Wishing good news for you today!
Posted by: Paige | July 16, 2010 at 07:23 AM
Should be going on now, right?? I'm sending comforting and happy thoughts your way.
Oh, and by the way, 34G????!!!??? You are going to make quite a few heads turn on the beach!! :D
Hoping for a great update!
Posted by: Brenda | July 16, 2010 at 07:38 AM
I think that you're probably in your appointment right now, so I am sending you a million good vibes and positive thoughts! Strong heartbeats, good measurements, a healthy mama and two healthy little babies!
How about the USVI for a beach vacation? We went to ST. Thomas and St. John for our honeymoon and it was AMAZING. St. John is definitely more expensive, but there are a ton of oceanfront resorts on St. Thomas!
Posted by: Erin | July 16, 2010 at 08:18 AM
I'm so glad that you're feeling positive, and can't wait to hear the good news.
I am also much surprised that I had no idea that we were the exact same size (well, 34G pre-pregnancy). I definitely want to see photos of this bikini.
Posted by: Rachel | July 16, 2010 at 09:05 AM
Hoping to hear good news very soon! Thinking of you guys...
Posted by: Kate | July 16, 2010 at 09:26 AM
Keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you. Cleaning up for the housekeeper..I do that too! :)
Posted by: LisaJane | July 16, 2010 at 10:06 AM
You must be getting that u/s right about now. I hope you are grinning ear to ear.
Posted by: Kami | July 16, 2010 at 11:32 AM